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Bush to Allow Mixed Marriages

Author: Democrats May Marry Republican Spouses After Loyalty Check, Says President

Posted: 10:36 AM (-0500 TZ)

WASHINGTON (GWB) --
President Bush signed a bill allowing Democrats to wed Republican spouses after passing a simple loyalty check with Attorney General Ashcroft. Subjects will be required to kiss the flag, praise Jesus, and serve two years occupation duty in Baghdad.

Pure Democratic couples will have to remain in concentration camps, however, until the global war on terror has been won. Asked when that might be, Bush said, "in a jiffy, probably no more than two or three generations."

The new law instantly found favor with progressive Republican leaders. "Hasta la vista, Baby," commented newly elected California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger as Ashcroft's political police dragged off his relatives on the Shriver side of the family. "The Shriver-Kennedy clan is wonderful," he added, "and I'm sure some of them will pass the loyalty test, even my wife." For the time being, however, they are being held in a camp formerly used to intern the Japanese during WWII.

Schwarzenegger's remarks were made at a conference with Bush and Ken Lay, in which the trio discussed plans for Enron to solve California's budget deficit with "creative accounting."

 

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